I have been sitting with the possibility of cutting my hair.
What does long hair mean to me as a man?
What does a clean and tight style mean for me in the world?
How does our aesthetic inform who we attract and should it? Is energy more than abstraction; is it also the material adornments and body language?
I know that long hair is a form of peacocking to women. It shows the feminine that I understand the responsibility of long hair, maintenance, and sensitivity. It tells women that they can be safe in communicating their needs in curating their look, and the time and money it requires. (photo credit @dashira.designs)
However, in dawning the long hair, I find myself pigeon holed into the tribal, hippy community and invisible to my former corporate colleagues. Meanwhile, these very people are those that I can most help. High intellectual foundation, deep personal development, deep integrity, and heart centered builders are operating throughout our corporate industries. These individuals can struggle to find meaning within the evolving culture-scape and are ready to work with their former peers who have braved the unknown, drank the medicines, and learned the movement and sonic practices to calibrate their psychology, and maps, to the requirements of the new world. But can these critical builders see me through the aesthetic of my jungle brothers?
The vision of the corporate mystic has been filling my dreams the last few weeks. I am stepping back into business with renewed energy and momentum. My men’s work has significantly deepened, and I am finding myself missing the sharp suits, manicured hands, and fresh styles of my miami and NYC community. LA, I love you. Amazonia, I am you. And NYC, don’t forget me–I am coming home!
The move to curate the mane back to a match for the community I can serve is a move I see as critical to the next step of integration with my true community.
There is a scene in SLC punk where the main character cuts his mohawk and interviews for a job. “We can do a hell of a lot more damage inside the system than outside of it.” Here the protagonist integrates his adolescent rebellion and labels his former self a ‘poser.’ While I do not believe my long hair has been posing in the spiritual community, this is a facet of the yoga-huasca communities where long hair is a part of the resume demonstrating just how “liberated” a man has become in his quest to re-engage his raw wildness. But how much further free is one who has gone wild and come home stronger?
I am ready to return from the jungle, pick up the stack of work deliverables, and resume the true work of building infrastructure for the next generation. While I could overcompensate for the long hair by wearing nice suits and smarter watches, the reality is that this level of curation may detract from my relatability and continue to feed the egoic narcissism of being “that guy” who wants everyone to know he is special.
What if I am no one? Unremarkable in group settings, yet deeply experienced upon engaging in dialogue. This is where I can stand next to my brothers and sisters at the beginnings of their journeys and serve as their guide throughout their transformation, without triggering onlookers to the fact that they too are feeling called to the wild, to the jungle, and to those ancient threads that have inspired hearts and minds throughout our human story.
I’ll see you all at happy hour with a blazer and a smile. Ask me about the jungles, deserts, and canyons. There is much to share.
(midjourney + inswapID to render the potential results of upcoming restyle!)